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Alternate Endings: By Christopher di Armani
Christopher di Armani lives in Lytton, BC, Canada, with his two dogs, Koda and Tuco. He's an avid IDPA and IPSC shooter, reloader, computer programmer, writer, documentary film-maker and alleged recluse. When not playing on the mountain with his dogs, he also works in the Props department on movies filmed in Vancouver. His believes
strongly in the "freedom of the individual", which has long been his
inspiration for articles, stories and scripts speaking out against
bureaucratic tyranny. He can be contacted at christopher@diArmani.com
How would today's America be different if politician's feared citizens, rather than citizen's fearing their government? Imagine, if you will, the Land of the Free, Home of the Brave. Where individual rights meant something, and every citizen believed they had the right, nay, the duty, to stand up to any and all aggressors, foreign and domestic. You know, just like the Constitution says. You've never heard of Ruby Ridge, although Vicky Weaver is alive and well, raising her children with husband Randy. They live in their secluded home, their lives unhindered by government intrusion. Randy occasionally does work on people's firearms, and has a fine collection of his own. He hunts deer to put steaks on the table for his family. They live, all in all, a fine, if humble life. Lon Horiuchi? Never heard of him. Although my cousin says there's this guy in Santa Monica flipping burgers. Thinks that might be him. Sounds about right. There's this place down near Waco Texas, Mount Carmel to be exact. A quaint little town, with a religious group living nearby in a small homestead. They keep to themselves, and the townspeople do the same. David Koresh and his followers devote their days to studying the bible as they understand it, raising their children, and enjoying all that life has to offer. Yes, they have quite a few guns. So what? Doesn't everybody? In Oklahoma, there is no Murrah Building, nor has it ever been blown up. It was never built, since the government, living true to the Constitution, had no need for it. They didn't need a place to house the BATF. Or the FBI, or a whole host of other "alphabet-soup" agencies. They don't exist. It's part of why Randy and Vicky Weaver are alive and well, raising their children in the wilderness of Idaho. It's why David Koresh is alive and well, living in Waco, Texas. Timothy McVeigh? A funny sort of guy, served his time (mandatory) in the army, and joined the local militia upon his return from training. You know, just like every other able-bodied American, aged twelve to forty-five, does. He never went overseas. American armed forces don't do that. America doesn't believe in sending US soldiers to die someone else's country, for someone else's ideals. Americans fight and die for one thing and one thing only: The Constitution. You know, like those fine boys down in Athens, Tennessee did, on a hot August night back in '46. Damned fine thing the President did, making August 1st "Athens Day", in honor of them. Damned fine. So McVeigh never felt the need to blow up a federal building in Oklahoma. He didn't feel the urge to take revenge on a government out of control, because he'd never heard of Randy Weaver. Or David Koresh. Or even Waco, Texas, for that matter. Janet Reno? I think she teaches 2nd grade in Skokie, Illinois. At least, last time anyone heard of her, that's where she was. Damn fine with little kids, they say. Elian Gonzales? Very sad, his mother drowning like that. Thank God his grandmothers were willing, like all good grandparents, to raise the boy. Anyway, he grew up to be a fine man. Him and his wife Juanita raised a couple of kids, one of whom is running for Governor of Florida. They tell me the smart money says he'll win. No, not because his father had an MP5 shoved in his face when he was five years old. Never happened. No, Elian is one of the finest gunsmiths in America. People come from all over to purchase his firearms. There was no government raid on his grandmother's home. There wasn't an FBI to raid the place. Besides, the kid hadn't done anything wrong. He came to America with his mother of his own free will. Like folks from all over the world still do. Why? Because this is the Land of the Free, and the Home of the Brave. This is a land where a man can do as he pleases, without fear of persecution from any person, much less any government. Where when the government gets out of line, the people are ready, willing and able to put it back in its place. There's what some refer to as "this crazy old guy" living in a small town in New England. Lives in a tar-paper shack down by the water. Shot a couple of sheriffs and a judge some time back. Guess they tried telling him what he could and could not do with his own land. See, there'd been a flood. Damn thing ripped away 80 feet of his property and washed it away. Bloody bureaucrats tried telling him he couldn't dump a bunch of rocks and dirt there to restore his property to its original size. Wrote a damned bylaw and everything, just to make it look all "legal". Damned judge signed an order for him to remove his property restoration project, or they'd seize his home, sell it and toss him out onto the street. Needless to say, old Carl was none too happy with any of them bureaucrats. So the cops, they pissed him off one day. Pulled him over to harass him in the supermarket parking lot. Well, Carl's no spring chicken, neither's his truck. Little ding in the fender here, a few rust holes there. So what? Cops pulled him over to ticket him for the rust holes. Well, I guess those boys learned their lesson, didn't they? Old Carl killed them both, went and whacked the judge who signed the order, and drove home. Made himself a pot of chili, so the story goes. Couple of neighbors came over to talk with old Carl. Said it wasn't right to go killing a judge or the local sheriffs, although they sure understood why he did. Said they figure they'd have done the same of the judge had tried telling them they couldn't restore flood damage on their property, too. The new sheriff? The one sworn in to replace the one left dead in the parking lot? He went to visit old Carl. Made a fine display of leaving his sidearm in his car before coming onto Carl's property. Guess I would have too, if Carl's M-16 was pointed at my chest. Anyways, they apparently had a good chat. Sheriff said there'd be no more hassling him about the riverbank. Carl said that was fine; there'd likely be no more dead sheriffs, either. Story goes they shook hands and have left each other alone ever since. In Las Vegas is this guy with a funny name. Polish, I think. He's a writer. Does lots of newspaper articles on freedom, the rights of the individual. Vin, I think his name is. Friends do not call him Vinny, though. Not unless they want a cuff across the ear, that is. Damn fine writer though. His books are best-sellers, and a couple of them are required reading in university. I guess they could be required reading in school. Probably are. Hard to tell though, since so many schools are really nothing more than a spare room in someone's home. Of COURSE folks educate the kids at home. What are you, daft? There's always one parent kicking around, and usually a grandparent or four as well. Back in the 1800's, the prairies had one-room school-houses, paid for by the residents of the town. Not much has changed, in that respect. Some towns still do that. The city? They tried building schools and hiring teachers. Didn't get very far. People got their knickers into quite a knot when the city tried passing a bylaw and a tax to pay for it all. Couple of city councilors and the mayor got shot, if I recall. Served the bastards right, trying to bring that communist youth propaganda crap into this county. The shooters? Nobody's heard from them since. No need, I guess, since the city government never tried that crap again. People have all kinds of cars, some fancy, some not. This place in California tried issuing a "drivers license" scheme some time back. Think those state politicians got a taste of lead, just like those city councilors with the school thing. Damn good riddance, too. School speed zones? What the hell's that? You gonna make people slow down just because there's a couple of kids on the road? Don't you think you ought to teach the kids to watch for cars before they cross the road? You know, like any responsible parent does? Whoa, what are you saying? How do one of the parents afford to stay at home? What are you, stupid? Every family has one parent at home. Taxes? What taxes? Government only does a few things. Doesn't take much. Most folks just pay the bill once a year. Never amounts to more than a few hundred dollars. Just as it should be. Hell, most folks get resentful at that much. Makes sense, I guess, given we founded the damn country over a tax on tea. Since then, government on this side of the pond hasn't seen much sense in pissing off the people. Sure, some try now and then. There's always some petty jerk who thinks he can tell someone else what to do. But they never last. Sure, folks put up with them for a while, just like you do with a rash or a runny nose. But after a little while folks get tired of the whining and crying the petty jerks make when people won't do what he figures they ought to. The petty ones get a little too uppity, and someone smacks him down. Sometimes, it takes only a little slap across the face to bring the petty jerks to their senses. Sometimes, someone like old Carl grabs the rifle off the wall, slaps a full mag in, and says, "Time to teach these bastards a lesson." Damn, if that doesn't work every time.
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